"Mommy, you look good in those heels." One sentence was enough to make me pause while trying to hurry out the door to make it on time for church last week. My 4 year old, Anna, only compliments when she really means it. This was not the first time I'd felt 'put together' lately, but it was the first time in a long time I'd worn heels. And somehow in her little impressionable mind that's what made the difference to make an 'ok' looking Mommy into a Mommy worth complimenting. That day I resolved to find the woman she was complimenting, and let her be seen more often. I realized that as much as I love her, she needs my example of how to be the respectable woman I want her to become. If wearing heels helps her think her Mom is someone she wants to be like, then heels it is. I know that if she doesn't look up to me as she grows up, she will find it in other women. Women I may not approve of, and more importantly women that are not God-fearing. And this is something that has to happen now, when she's young and doesn't have exposure to other women to mimic or look up to. I shouldn't wait until she's a teenager to instill the trait of respecting her body, because I know it's too late then. Since having babies I've certainly 'let myself go' as they say. Of course I have good intentions to loose the last of the pregnancy weight I gained, and to exercise routinely again. Obviously I just didn't have the right motivation. Babies, infants especially, like the extra cushion a Mom has, and I'll just put it out there and say my hubby likes what's happened up top as I gained weight. But I no longer have infants to hold all day, and I'm not raising my husband (that's a whole other blog).
Somehow my daughter's approval of how I look, dress, and act are far more important to me, and is a serious motivating factor to push myself that extra minute on the rowing machine. (Frank used to row Crew in college, I'm using his machine to exercise...it's cheaper than a gym.)
I'm writing this mostly to look back on and remember this moment in time when my thoughts changed about myself. A reminder of why I do what I do, and my deep down desire to raise girls who love themselves as much as I love them.
